RETURNING HOME

As eve sets in, quietude embraces my world, once again.

Cottages dim, as a slight fog enhances street lights with misty halos.

Hearths, scented with seasoned wood, warms the heart, as streetcars pass,

beckoning all to retire,

 retrieve and retreat, feel the blessing bestowed

 celebrating cycles of life, in need of soulful rest.

 

I succumb to you, as a fire dances shadows, upon the walls –

A voice within, quiets my mind, and the day now closes,

 as finely braided wool shaded in greens and reds

so gently covers my soul,

reminding me of you. 

Lisa O’Hara, 11-30-08

2:31 a.m.

 

FALL’S FOOTPRINTS

FALL’S FABULOUS FOOTPRINT                                                                                                              
FALL’S                                                         (Having a bit of trouble with Xanga, as you can.  Sorry.)                                                                                                       FABULOUS                                                                                                                                                        FOOTPRINT                                                                                                                                                      My eyes behold sights,                                                                                                                                        
taunting me to listen once                                                                                                                                      more.                                                                                                                                                                  A spectrum of colors,                                                                                                                                          
the palette of God,                                                                                                                                              
He speaks in quiet tones.                                                                                                                                    
                                                                                                                                                                          
An imprint of life’s promises,                                                                                                                               
floating, as angel’s wings wisp by;                                                                                                                       
An unfolding of new awe                                                                                                                                    
awakens within me.                                                                                                                                            
                                                                                                                                                                         
Fabulous footprints align my path,                                                                                                                       
new choices await,                                                                                                                                             
as Fall calls to me,                                                                                                                                               
reminding me this is the footprint                                                                                                                         
                                                                                                                                                                         
~of God                                                                                                                                                             
My eyes behold sights,                                                                                                                                     
t  wRITTaunting me to listen once more.                                                                                                      
A spectrum of colors,                                                                                                                                       
the palette of God,                                                                                                                                           
He speaks in quiet tones.                                                                                                                                
                                                                                                                                                                         
An imprint of life’s promises,                                                                                                                        
floating, as angel’s wings wisp by;                                                                                                               
An unfolding of new awe                                                                                                                                
awakens within me.                                                                                                                                         
                                                                                                                                                                          
Fabulous footprints align my path,                                                                                                                 
new choices await,                                                                                                                                            
as Fall calls to me,                                                                                                                                           
reminding me this is the footprint                                                                                                                   
                                                                                                                                                                           of
of God written byLisa O’Hara, copywrited

My dear Xanga friends…..I’ve not forgotten any of you – I’ve just been busy with keeping up with my life and all the challenges that come with the 28 month separation from my husband, which in and of itself, creates the many hardships we’ve all endured during our lives.  I have not been in a writing mode, per se, but am reading much and have come across an article I wish to share with you.  Its eloquence brought my heart to a new awareness and perhaps answers questions for which I have been seeking, and unknowingly, perhaps the answers are housed within me.   I’ve been within that Venn diagram trying still, to figure out the whys and hows of a 22 year marriage that dissipated – perhaps now I can put the questions to rest and just be who I am, accept who I am and quit trying to discern what I’ve done to bring on a fate that I know I, too, contributed to, but I am who I am and the puzzle pieces of a marriage changed ~ and that’s ok!  Somehow I am feeling more self acceptance this early morning at 6:00 a.m. than I’ve felt in my life.  Perhaps it’s okay to sit quietly, be part of the Universe and quit searching on how to better myself.  When I need to change, I just will and I can let go of the guilt that somehow I failed instead of realizing the season changed and it was time to adopt a new life. 

This is not a well thought out write – but one that was necessary this 7th day of November, 2008 – me to me.  I hope you have the time to read the following, as perhaps it will shed a new light at the end of any tunnel you may be in presently…..maybe there is no need for any tunnel.  It only creates more darkness which inhibits our view of who we are! 

ASK THE RIGHT QUESTIONS!                                 

I want to share with you the most important lesson I learned in my recent bouts of depression. Well, actually, I ‘knew’ this before but this time, I’ve ‘got’ it at a new and deeper level.

Here it is: I’m seeking a deeper level of acceptance. An acceptance of who I am now, no matter what this looks like. There’s no need for change of any kind – I’m fine just the way I am.

As soon as I got this flash of insight, I found these incredible words from Oriah Mountain Dreamer in her book, The Dance. She writes that a Grandmother spoke to her while she was sleeping and said, “Wrong question, Oriah.”

“What if the question is not why am I so infrequently the person I really want to be, but why do I so infrequently want to be the person I really am?

“ …what the Grandmother is telling me is true: that who we are by our essential nature is enough; that we are right now in this moment capable of being compassionate and fully present in intimate relationship with ourselves, the world, and the Mystery; that we are all we need to be by our nature; that there is no need for self-improvement; that we live our deepest soul’s desires not by intending to change who we are but by intending to be who we are. And clearly our intention—to change or to be who we are—profoundly shapes how we live, what we believe we must do to learn, whether we feel we must ceaselessly push ourselves to reach higher or simply find the courage and confidence to allow who we are to unfold.”

Thank you, Oriah! I am choosing to let go of the struggle and allow who I am to unfold.

~ Patrice

“Why be afraid, beautiful one?
Nothing is required of you.
Truly.
Simply breathe and be the perfect expression of love that you already are.
Everything else is gravy.”

— Jennifer Louden

I thank Jennifer Louden for the most beautiful thoughts, and Patrice for her insight shared with those of us who keep trying to be ‘BETTER.”     Hugs to you all, Lisa.